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Post by Ramses on Jul 14, 2018 16:44:04 GMT -8
Posted by Ramses on November 10, 1997 at 12:58:49:
In Reply to: Oh boy, is this going to stir up the Board... posted by Tessa on November 10, 1997 at 01:11:41:
Tessa-
I have not met you but feel I know you a little thru the board.
Almost everyone I know has or has had a "Monkey" at one time or another. Mine is always thirsty.
You have a lot of people in this forum who care about you, myself included.
If you need to talk or vent, drop me a line at
Ramses53@hotmail.com
Chin up !
R.
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Post by SilverC on Jul 14, 2018 16:46:11 GMT -8
Posted by SilverC on November 10, 1997 at 21:00:31:
In Reply to: Oh boy, is this going to stir up the Board... posted by Tessa on November 10, 1997 at 01:11:41:
Tessa, As someone sai in another post, you have taken the first step by admitting your dependancy. But, as another post says, unless you want to stop you won't.
I too know you only threw this board but there is a bond between alot of the people who participate and I do feel one with you.
I send to you support love and whatever energy you need to defeat your dependancy (asuming you want to quit).
My strongest wishes for your success in winning your battle.
SilverC
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GeeDubformerly Flyfisher
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Post by GeeDubformerly Flyfisher on Jul 14, 2018 16:48:42 GMT -8
Posted by GeeDubformerly Flyfisher on November 10, 1997 at 23:08:16:
In Reply to: Oh boy, is this going to stir up the Board... posted by Tessa on November 10, 1997 at 01:11:41:
Dear Tessa,
Your honesty and the outpouring and all types of concern---all of it touches me. You know me, square Gary, Flyfisher...met you with Doc & Omerta. That square guy was a walking, talking ass kicking 60's and 70's rock and roller and did everything that went with the territory. I didn't actively seek to stop using drugs...I just found other areas of life that consumed my interest and passions and it just faded slowly. There is no moral to the story here about me. I'm no role model. I've always admired your implicit honesty and like so many people on this board, it has boiled down to a very close knit thing for me. I just want you to know I care about you no matter who or what you do. You are the driver of your life and from the type of integrity you've demonstrated, you'll find your way. Please remember that it goes beyond whores and johns at some point. We're people and some of us care. That's how I feel. Gary---GeeDub, formerly Flyfisher
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Post by Omerta on Jul 14, 2018 16:55:06 GMT -8
Concerning Tessa::PLS read
Posted by Omerta on November 10, 1997 at 10:44:18:It's nice to see our close knit group rally together to show support for one of our own. I looked over everyones posts after I saw Tessa's, and decided to reply to you all here. This is how I see it, please feel free to comment or critisize.
Prostitution is a lifestyle. Plain and simple, it is life in the fast lane and it takes its toll on those involved. That fact hits home when someone you "heard about" is someone you actually know. Tessa is not alone in her meth usage, there are more, alot more. You can't save the world folks, but you can do your part one person at a time.
The hows and whys of Tessa's drug usage is irrelavent and acedemic. The fact that the habit is there is all we need to know. Why she does it, where does she get it, doesn't matter right now.
Tessa is into Meth, is in trouble, and needs our help. So how do we help? In my eyes, it's not enough to say to someone, "we feel for you, you need to quit, & let me know if I can do anything." Although the thoughts are sincere, I'm sorry to say they fall short of what's really needed. I think Tessa needs to hear some options from us.
Jumping into Tessa shoes for a while: Tessa and girls like her are survivors. They survive by their looks, their wit, & their charms. Whatever it takes. It's very easy for us to say "don't worry about the 20 lbs., we'll still love you." Although said with the best of intentions, love and kindness don't pay the bills when you bank on your looks to get by.
Tessa has alot of "irons in the fire.", prostitution is only a small part of her life. She models, is good with computers, and is highly intelligent. She is on the brink of getting national exposure. She has alot of potential.
If she stops cold turkey, she may gain weight, thereby possibly affecting her income. If she continues her health will fail. If Tessa opts for stability and gets a regular job, she will have to cut down on her shedule and persue her dreams part time. See?, there is no clean solution. So let's put our heads together and try to see things as she sees them, and give this girl some livable solutions to consider. We can't tell anyone what to do, all we can do is advise.
Comments?....Tessa??
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Post by Pat on Jul 14, 2018 16:58:11 GMT -8
Concerning Tessa::PLS read
Posted by Pat on November 10, 1997 at 16:07:52: In Reply to: Concerning Tessa::PLS read posted by Omerta on November 10, 1997 at 10:44:18: This morning I gave a quick gut feeling response to Tessa's problem. I have had a chance to think about it today and read many of the post on this. The answer like many others have said lies within Tessa. The only way Tessa will quit is when she wants to bad enough.
I have been where she is at and maybe even worse. She knows all the ways to quit but will only do it when things get so bad that it wakes her up to reality. At that time all the answers will be obvious to her. We can incourage and stand by her, but only Tessa can decide to quit. Lets all hope that she does it before the drugs win the battle.
Tessa take a good look at what this is doing to you. Don't listen to the drugs talking, and giving you reasons not to quit. Listen to the friends here that care about you even if we don't really know you. If you have a special someone to be with that will help,but most likely you are on your own and only you can fix this problem.
I hope you win
Pat
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Post by XXX on Jul 14, 2018 16:59:49 GMT -8
Posted by XXX on November 10, 1997 at 16:12:29:
In Reply to: Re: Concerning Tessa::PLS read posted by Pat on November 10, 1997 at 16:07:52:
Very well said Pat that is the same way I look at it. By the way where have you been, and what happend to your web site? XXX
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Post by Nedleford on Jul 14, 2018 17:01:57 GMT -8
Posted by Nedleford on November 10, 1997 at 18:38:49:
In Reply to: Re: Concerning Tessa::PLS read posted by Pat on November 10, 1997 at 16:07:52:
very well said, bashful and Pat...I know ecatly what each of you fell and have gone thru...We can all pray and hope that Tess gives up the habit but we are not in her shoes and cannot condemn..We can urge and most importantly be there when she needs us(people on the board, as friends)..Friends will do anyrthing for friends and i gather if tess wants halp with her problem, a great many of us will step forward and help.
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Post by Spock on Jul 14, 2018 17:04:18 GMT -8
Posted by Mr Spock on November 10, 1997 at 18:39:43:
In Reply to: Re: Concerning Tessa::PLS read posted by Pat on November 10, 1997 at 16:07:52:
I agree with you Pat and don't have much to add beyond what everyone has already contributed. I too have been there and done that, perhaps not to the same degree. I know from personal experience that we all have an internal limit which when reached will cause us to act in a way to force a change. I sense that Tessa is close to that limit by the fact that she spoke out publicly. Tessa is very intelligent, knows and faces herself honestly. I have faith in her ability to make the change when she decides the time is right. When she determines what specific help she needs, she can count on her friends in this community to provide it.
I read a book recently by Gelsey Kirkland, the ballerina who succumbed to, then recovered from cocaine addiction (co-authored with Greg Lawrence) called "Dancing on my Grave". Not that it has the answers for Tessa, but it might provide further insight from someone who faced the problem from a very personal point of view.
Tessa, be strong and decide for yourself.
Respectfully, Spock
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Post by Treadhead on Jul 14, 2018 17:06:51 GMT -8
Posted by Treadhead on November 10, 1997 at 11:21:44:
In Reply to: Concerning Tessa::PLS read posted by Omerta on November 10, 1997 at 10:44:18:
Omerta:
You have raised some pretty important issues here.
The how's and why's are important.
As far as the how's...those who 'slam' or 'mainline' (IV use) run the greater risk. Tessa doesn't do this...so there's good news there.
The why is the key. Not being a cousellor, I am not qualified to comment here.
Like I said, this is a subject near and dear to me. I have a friend in the same situation. Because I cared deeply for this person, I found myself right in the middle of her problem...which probably clouded my perceptions and rendered me unable to provide the help that a friend should have been able to provide. This type of problem has wide reaching consequences.
There is the short term and the long term issues.
Short term. Weight gain. Some who quit gain weight, others don't. Doesn't apply in every case. Bottom line, it is controllable and fixable.
Long term. Various health risks, including psycological as well as physical. Meth (crank) works on the central nervous system...causes the heart to work harder and faster than it was designed to. As the person gets older, heart problems become a major risk.
Solutions: Counselling and plenty support from friends.
Maybe this is a rather simplistic answer to a complex problem. But at this point, it's the best I have.
In closing, I'd like to say this. The short term effects I've noted are fixable and temporary. The long term effects of continued use are not.
Treadhead
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Post by Omerta on Jul 14, 2018 17:09:05 GMT -8
Posted by Omerta on November 10, 1997 at 11:32:17:
In Reply to: Re: Concerning Tessa::PLS read posted by Treadhead on November 10, 1997 at 11:21:44:
Hey T.H.
Damm, I like you.
Okay, I stand corrected, the "why" is important, but we are not qualified. I am also well aware of the limitations of providing support via e-mail, ICQ, and board posts.
I think Tessa needs to hop on this thread to clarify things. MHO, the weight is an issue. Suppose she does gain it?, will it affect her income? If yes, what will she do while she loses it, $$ wise. There has to be something there to make up for the potentailly lost revenue.
O.
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Interested bystander
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Post by Interested bystander on Jul 14, 2018 17:11:14 GMT -8
Posted by Interested bystander on November 10, 1997 at 16:00:12:
In Reply to: Re: Concerning Tessa::PLS read::Treadhead posted by Omerta on November 10, 1997 at 11:32:17:
I have seen Tessa unclothed and I do not think weight gain would affect her income from her customer's standpoint. I think the big problem as far as weight is concerned is Tessa's perception of her weight. Tessa, if you read this a woman does not need to be model thin to be beautiful and sexy.
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Post by Treadhead on Jul 14, 2018 17:14:47 GMT -8
Posted by Treadhead on November 10, 1997 at 11:52:56:
In Reply to: Re: Concerning Tessa::PLS read::Treadhead posted by Omerta on November 10, 1997 at 11:32:17:
Omerta:
Thanks. You are ok in my book too :-)
In my opinion, I don't think that weight gain will affect her income. Some who quit don't gain. As for me, I party with a lot of ladies who aren't model skinny...but then again that's me.
But I digress...
I'd like to tell a short story here (I promise to keep it short).
I while ago, I mentioned I lost a friend. He passed away just a few days before his 50th birthday. The autopsy said it was from a massive heart attack. And yes, he was a heavy meth user, and had been for years.
All that knew him agreed that the lifestyle he led was a leading factor. In Sacramento's North area, drugs flow like water. Sad but true.
When all's said and done, the end result is this. The man who was a good friend to many of us is no longer with us. To put it quite bluntly, he is as dead as Tiberius Caesar. Everything that he was is now gone. I will never see him again. And his passing is not the first I've experienced from this type of situation.
I don't want to see it happen to another decent human being.
Please forgive me if I seem melodramatic. But it still hurts...and it will for some time.
Thanks again Treadhead
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Post by Omerta on Jul 14, 2018 17:18:08 GMT -8
Posted by Omerta on November 10, 1997 at 12:01:33:In Reply to: Re: Concerning Tessa::PLS read::Treadhead posted by Treadhead on November 10, 1997 at 11:52:56:
Don't misinterpet what I am saying! I would like to see her quit being a hooker. I brought up the weight issue to point out that there are alot of factors in her life. She doesnt have a "regular" job like most people. Things that you & I may take for granted may have a tremendous impact in her life.
Capisco?
O.
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Post by Treadhead on Jul 14, 2018 17:20:11 GMT -8
Posted by Treadhead on November 10, 1997 at 12:08:22:
In Reply to: Re: Concerning Tessa::PLS read::Treadhead posted by Omerta on November 10, 1997 at 12:01:33:
Ti capisco. Sono solo preoccupato. Non volgio vedere mei amici soffrere.
My Italian undoubtedly leaves much to be desired. I understand what you say. And your point is well taken.
I'm concerned...and do not want to lose another friend.
PS. Was I on-target with the Italian? It's been a few years and I'm a bit rusty.
A Semi-bilingual Treadhead
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Post by Counsel on Jul 14, 2018 17:22:25 GMT -8
Posted by Counsel on November 10, 1997 at 11:28:48:
In Reply to: Concerning Tessa::PLS read posted by Omerta on November 10, 1997 at 10:44:18:
Omerta is exactly right. We (or some of us) are not unaware that there are forces in Tess's life which direct and/or limit her choices.
Tess must do what she must, and we must help how we can. I hope and pray it will be enough . . .
Counsel
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